Saturday, September 24, 2011

Genuine love for one another

Artist: Van Gogh

Do you love someone only to find yourself trying to change that person? Take a look at this observation:

The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.

~ Thomas Merton

It is very hard to be the one who is twisted to conform to another's image. And there is nothing more wonderful than to be loved for oneself. Looking for our own reflection in another, however, can stem from an unhealthy degree of narcissism.


  1. Not even a tweak here and there?

  2. A tweak?

    I'm sorry. I don't get it.

  3. Oh, now I get it. SURE! People need to adjust to other people with whom they're in any kind of relationship, of course!

    I think Merton is talking about those who are attached to the idea of other people really as extensions of themselves. That's quite different from - ha! - a tweak here and there! :-)

  4. Actually I was just being my usual smart aleck self. By the way. I recognize the Van Gogh from another post you made. See? I'm paying attention.


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